High priests and sacrifice
Can anyone out there explain to me what it IS with tech people? I mean, I expect the lack of social skills that means most of them donâ€™t actually speak English and they punctuate every conversation with long, exasperated sighs, but at the end of it, isnâ€™t the whole thing a little counter-productive it they actually create worse problems then theyâ€™ve been asked to solve?
Take yesterday (Oh please, please, will somebody take yesterday?) When my web lady wanted to add the software for the upcoming book forum to my site, I ended up having to change servers, and in the process I took on a new email address. Which is a hassle but fine, I can deal with that, so I added it, and a week later found I was not getting any of the old email. So I asked how to add that, followed directions, and put it in, only to have the same fifty emails continually loading into my inbox until I had 451 unread emails. Not what I had in mind.
So I phones my old email provider who says, this is the other serverâ€™s problem. No, that man says, this is the first serverâ€™s problem. And so I go through it again with a second person at the old serverâ€™s Tech Support (has to be in capitals, theyâ€™re the bloody goddamned High Priests of the Internet, with all those long-suffering sighs) who says, can you bring the thing down? But I need to be at home and I canâ€™t drive into town and back for the entire afternoon and meanwhile these fifty emails have reproduced again and I now have 575 unread emails, so he says Iâ€™ll need to delete and re-install the email programs, and he gives me all that information you need for such activities, logins and passwords and such, and off I goes to my web person to make sure I have the same information for the new account.
This is not, let me make it clear, some teenaged son of a friend who tells me this, nor is it the kid who delivers propane who happens to see my problem and offers his advice. This is the Tech Support (all hail, the Gods of the Web) of an official, long-time Internet provider to whom Iâ€™ve been paying money for years and years.
And so we sits us down over the phone, my web lady and me, and we deletes the program (yep, just highlight it and push the delete button the lady says) and then we types in all that shiny technical information the nice man has given us and we pushes the save button and up comes the one and then the other email address in the box and then I looks at the old inbox and there ainâ€™t nothing there, I mean there ainâ€™t nothing there. Nothing. There.
And I feels a bit like old Wile E. Coyote looking down between his feet at a great and gaping emptiness, and I says to her I says, Whereâ€™s my email?
And she says (all indignant-like) to me she says, You deleted it.
Not having sort of thought to explain to this person who doesnâ€™t know jack about programs and couldnâ€™t explain what an ISB port is that sure, when you delete and reinstall any other kind of program in the damnable machine, itâ€™ll save the information and then tuck it back into the new version of the program nice and neat, but thatâ€™s sort of not how email works. And maybe the provider can help you get it back.
And when I hunts down the nice young man at the provider and all we can come up with is the last weeksâ€™ stuff thatâ€™s already arranged itself onto the inbox, and I ask (choking a little by now, but I think he heard me pretty loud and clear) how he could possibly imagine I would want to delete four years worth of emails, FIFTY half-completed projects, and every GODDAMN ADDRESS I HAVE, he says (pretty indignant-like, himself,) But I did suggest you bring the machine down here. No, sorry I ruined your day and cost you hours of work and untold confusion. No, sorry Iâ€™m going to cost you hundreds, probably thousands of dollars to send the brain to the electro-neurosurgeons to see what they can retrieve. No, yes, I, a professional Technical Support Person, probably should have known this was the way Mac worked.
And before some Tech Support Wannabe out there scolds me for not backing stuff up, I am a compulsive backer-up. I have had three conversations with the man who sold me the computer, who ended up concluding that email couldnâ€™t be backed up. How this is possible I do not know, but thatâ€™s what the expert says. However, I am no longer sanguine about the pronouncements of experts, and may persist with the question.
All in all, yesterday was not a good day. Really not.